Dear Ones, so often we think the Universe hasn’t delivered on our prayers. We manifest, dream, and envision with such clarity and specificity, then wait by the door, eager to let in the goodness! Did we do it wrong? Were we bad at it? Or are we just bad?
No! The chances are – you haven’t been trained in the art of receiving. (Be sure to watch my #SelfLoveSermon replay here!)
Maybe asking is the difficult part for you. Now that you’ve nailed down your vision, your hitting a wall. To whom do you direct your request? What do you say? Don’t overcomplicate this part, Dear. You are worthy, you deserve good things. It truly doesn’t matter to whom you address your request, what matters is that you connect with your own trust.
In our capitalist culture, it’s no wonder we percieve manifestation to be transactional. It’s anything but! Manifesting your big dreams requires a lot of work on your part. The first quarter moon, or “moon spring” is for just that – initiating our actions and getting into alignment with whatever it is we’re envisioning for ourselves! Are you resisting doing the work? What steps do you need to take that you’ve been putting off?
Or maybe you’ve done the asking. You’ve done the work. But you’re still not getting anywhere. Could it be that you need a crash course in letting the goodness in (kinda like the difference between rushing through your pleasure and savoring it like a damn queen)? I’ve got you covered!
STEP ONE: CLEAR YOUR BLOCKS
We all will feel unworthy, undeserving, and even guilty for desiring certain things from time to time. Ain’t it fun being human? You don’t have to identify with this part of yourself! Luckily, you can begin retraining your mind, body, and nervous system for worthiness right now.
Pick a mantra that works for you – for example, I am a goddess. I am a child of God. I am the divine incarnate. I know I am worthy. I treat myself like I believe I am worthy. Write it down and hang it on your mirror. Place it on a sticky note on your computer monitor. Write it ten times in your journal each morning. Say it to yourself in the shower five times out loud. Start to see the subtle shifts that occur. And believe them.
Take note of the limiting belief patterns coming up in you as you focus on what you want to attract. The inner critic likes to have a heyday the minute we begin to believe we are powerful. Observe them, but don’t get dragged down with them. Perhaps write out what they say, and have a dialogue with them. What are they so afraid of? What is their angle? Usually, we discover they are trying – in their dark, twisted way – to protect and keep us safe. When we begin to pick apart their message, however, it’s clear to see it just doesn’t work. They aren’t equipped with the same skills our higher self has. If it helps, envision your higher self placing their hand on the inner critic’s shoulder, saying, “Thank you. I know you’re trying to help. I’ll take your worries into consideration. But I’ll take it from here.” Even just saying the inner critic’s messages out loud can help us hear their ridiculousness and laugh!
Know that you’re not alone with your imposter syndrome. I’ve had the privilege of working with high-powered women leaders, many of whom confided in me that they thought they weren’t enough. Between juggling their families, organizations, businesses, and aspirations, many of them just knew they were dropping the ball or lived in fear that they were about to. We all go through this! From the bottom of the totem pole to the C-Suite, many people you see as successful and having it altogether are actually going through the same inner battles as you. Allow this to bring you clarity, and reveal just how pervasive and delusional imposter syndrome is. We are all doing our best with what we’ve got, flying by the seat of our hotpants. Let’s cut ourselves some slack, and break these patterns now – so when we get where want to go, we’re not still in bed with them. Focusing on how you want to feel, rather than monetary goals, is a huge win for this reason!
Once you’ve listed your limiting beliefs, or journaled a conversation between your inner critic or your imposter syndrome, why not light it on fire in a little clearing ritual? Burning words, cleansing our spaces or bodies with smoke or water are all fabulous examples of clearing rituals! Remember – these are opportunities to play in the language of symbols and metaphors. Don’t take yourself too seriously, and have fun with it! Perhaps you’d like to set an intention of cleansing your body from doubt over your bath water as you pour in some salts. Or maybe you smoke cleanse your apartment with burning herbs, speaking aloud banishing spells to any and all forces that might sabotage your dream. Think of it as an outward way to show yourself you believe you are worthy, and show the Universe you are ready to receive.
STEP TWO: LET GO & SURRENDER
There are only two steps to this plan. And the first step above is really all the things you can “do” to make yourself ready to let go. This is where the good stuff is. It’s so simple, and it’s so difficult. Especially if we’re clinging to dear life for our personal status quo, our comfort zone, our normalcy. Do you say you’re ready for that dream job, but deep down unwilling to change your thought patterns? Or maybe you swear up and down you want to settle down and get serious, but can’t seem to break your commitment issues. It’s time to, one by one, begin peeling the fingers back on your death grip and push off the cliff into the unknown!
If you believe you are your thoughts, please start here: You can choose another thought, always. The next time your inner critic chimes in with a, “Who the hell do you think you are?” – I want you to clap back with a, “I am a child of God.” This is where the affirmations in step one come in handy. These are the most aligned thoughts you can believe about yourself, and they are 100% true.
Think about it: thoughts pop into our minds from nowhere, associations form, and much of our thought stepping stones are automatic. It’s the weight we give to them that make them stick, that has the power to alter the course of our day and even our life. And what makes a thought sticky? SHAME! Tara Brach calls it the trance of unworthiness – I know you know what I’m talking about. That soul-crushing feeling that we aren’t cut out for this life, and everyone is about to find out. It’s best we just hide here under this blanket rather than take any risks ever. What if, instead, you chose a more aligned thought? Just think: lighter, more easeful, more positive, or at least more caring toward yourself. The thoughts you believe about yourself shape your reality more than any other – don’t brush these aside, but challenge them! And when you are ready, replace them.
Speaking of thoughts, feel into all the ways you are subtly telling the Universe “No” and replace it with a full-body “Yes!” This requires immense letting go, because it requires trust. We’re afraid if we’re honest about what we really want, not only will we be separated from the pack, but we’ll be humiliated and feel even worse when we don’t get what we want! I hate to break it to you – but not speaking your desires aloud is the only surefire way to not get them. What if you tore those walls down, and let your truest, fullest self show up? Remember that the flip-side of excitement is fear. So often our nervous system interprets these two sensations as the same. Interrogate it, reframe it, and keep going.
We have to design little experiments to prove to the scared child within that it’s actually safe to receive. In the body, letting go might look like scanning for any tense or contracted muscles and actively relaxing each one, one by one. In the mind, surrendering can look like confronting and challenging the inner critic’s darkest thoughts about ourselves. In the spirit, maybe letting go is creating a work of art simply for the process and not the product. On a heart-level, maybe surrender looks like making the first move in a budding romance or calling a friend without texting first to make sure it’s a good time. Start small, then build in honesty and resolve from there. See how your bids for connection are met with equal and expansive responses. And if they aren’t, take it as a sign that this being you’re seeking connection with simply isn’t on the same path or pace as you. And let them go. You are now vibing at a higher frequency, and that might mean low-vibe people, opportunities, jobs, and spaces begin finding their exit stage-left from your life. Let them go.
Finally, accept what is. Acceptance and receiving are one in the same. Begin by receiving the present moment – it’s uncomfortable, annoying, glorious ebbing and flowing contained right here in this moment. Let the next 5 minutes be just what they are, nothing more, nothing less. Work your way out from there with a daily meditation practice. Accepting the room as it is. Accepting yourself as you are. For more resources, I highly recommend Tara Brach’s book Radical Acceptance. The power of being awake and aware is – many times – we find we already have everything we needed all along. Our eyes simply weren’t open to all we had unconsciously received.
Become conscious, make receiving a daily occurance, send your gratitude as a bat-signal to the Universe: “Send more of the same this way, please!” Embody full-body pleasure, presence, and awareness. Feed yourself little worthiness snacks, and just notice how much more goodness, blessings, and pleasure flow your way.
For more law of attraction wisdom, sign up for my signature group journey Womanifest! Over 4 weeks together, we will dig into each phase of attracting our deepest desires and biggest dreams from a divine feminine perspective (including receiving)! Hope to see you in class soon!